Investigatin me!

Good morning, evening and night to you dearest of readers,




It is never too late and for sure never wrong to introduce yourself over and over again from time to time, just to make sure people get to know "the blogger" and keep them interested in reading even more about "you".



Let's start...




My name is Fatima Jamal Bunafoor, a just-turned-20-years-old college girl majoring in English Language & Literature and minoring in American Studies in the University of Bahrain. I am a second daughter with an older brother and three younger sisters, Mary J 19, and the twin Zain and Farah who are 12 years old. Mom passed away about 7 years ago and dad took on a new bachelor’s lifestyle a couple months right after her death. He remarried, losing all five of us, got two new sons and got divorced about two years later. Granma went through hell trying to get our custody since dad was a really "nice" gentleman and the demon from hell, his wife that is, managed to torture my baby twin sisters who were only six years old at the time.




Ever since, we have moved in and out of about 4 houses till we settled down here right opposite dad's house with my mom's family, awkward isn't it! Now, we, that is ALL 10 of us including my sisters, brother, grandma, her two sisters - my great aunts, my direct aunt, and her son and daughter- my cousin. A full house you may say!



Enough details, back to the main subject - that is - ME! Kiddin'..


I barely made it through high school to college, I was not at all excited about studying because I was always frustrated with life, negative and depressed - the usual teen mentality. I am a very superstitious person not in the pattern that goes around walking in the street and runs into a black cat or an owl and gets freaked out, but in the sense that I over thinking stuff that at some points I believe I am paranoid and have daydreams that feel like premonitions about bad things that might happen. Oddly enough, a lot of those things do turn true. This obsession with analyzing, questioning, over thinking and insecurity has led me to suffer from a lot of phobias of heights, transportations, speed, darkness, stairs, sharp weapons, water, and even speaking to people freely. Insane I know!


Now you probably think I am seriously troubled but I am not =P.. Ask anyone, they all love me! And I am not even kidding! I wish I was it is killing me sometimes..




Moving on, what else... What else???



Oh yeah,, Relationships.. Ohhh.. spicy, naah! Pretty much normal..



Let's see..




Family-wise, I am unable to really connect with my family. I sometimes feel like I am this wild untamed horse belonging to the wild yet held in a closed stable and no one dares to brush her hair. I find peace in being absolutely forgotten and once I am remembered I erupted like a violent volcanic explosion scaring all those in the way. I can be pretty much hurtful because I am very much the keep it all in kind of person till the tipping point arrives, then, you do not really want to be around to witness that. Nonetheless, I love my family, yada yada yada and all that usual nonsense which amazingly is always true.




Friendship-wise, do not believe in it, yet all the people I know think I am one of their closest friends, I intend no cruelness, and all I do is try to be helpful for the sole aim of being moral nothing more or less, and this morality attaches friendship to such a relationship. My closest of people do understand that very clearly and try to work it out but never really grasp it but it always ends up harming them because I always just try to be nice even though I pretend like friendship is working out for me till the point it doesn't. To top all of this, I currently have two great best friends whom I really trust out of all people in ways I am unable to describe and I am fortunate to be able to trust anyone at all again in my life, past has been pleasant and you only seen the proof print with the flowery pictures as in all stories I suppose.




Boys-wise, not too crazy about them, never thought it was important to have a boyfriend, oh wait I am not supposed to say that it is forbidden, I mean fiancé people. I said nothing; it is all in your imaginations. I liked a guy kind of for about 3 years since high school but never really got to get to know him in a way that made me thinking "Yep, he is something." Though he really was something, he is still today a very dear brother of mine and I respect him to death. This year, I met an old friend who I always thought was cute, but innocent I never thought of anyone more than a friend brother. I got to know him even better, being the decent, handsome and the most thoughtful gentleman in the world that he is I found myself saying "Yes, he is a keeper." Yet, I failed =P.. The reasons are that I am a chicken, no, not really! I just was not comfortable with the whole idea of being in a relationship and being nervous all the times sends out the wrong signal. Big no no if you ask me. And we lived happily ever after.




People-wise, I love everything about it. The only things I really hate are that I cannot seem to be able to keep a straight face, be brutally honest and keep my promises, I seriously detest that!


Now.. Shall we move on to the funny, interesting and most revealing part of the show, I mean program, I mean blog, never mind, you know what I mean!




The good, the bad & the ugly! NAH! The usual stuff..


Little things about me, I love three colors in three forms; white for roses, dark red clothes on other people and the divine purple simply everywhere! I hate pink though it suits me because I am black, I hate short hair though mine is, and I detest chocolate in all forms, shapes and any other relevant eatable conditions!


I adore my smile and thank God for it. I love arts in all forms; I draw, write, read, meditate, design and clean when I am nervous or anxious it helps me calm down and refocus. Unfortunately, I do not manage to do that almost at all with my lifestyle but for the time being I stick to staring at the roof I it is very peaceful; I hope I can fix that though somehow soon. I am interested in politics, arts - as I mentioned above, youth issues, environment, empowerment, justice, traditions, music, poetry, basketball, volunteering and many others.


I am not at all into appearances including mine, just to be clear. I hate make up though I need some, glitter and shimmer, and I certainly find shopping a torture to humanity. I used to seriously obeisant and now I am just a bit overweight – I can actually say that. I own only two dresses, one of which I was forced to buy then wear and the second I have not worn yet – waiting for the right occasion I suppose. I am pretty much freaked out easily, you can stand right next to me talking and talking then touch my shoulder and I would scream in fear – kelesh Aadi! I am crazy about children especially those who are just speaking and have all the wrong pronunciations and cute voices.




Well, that was seriously long.. A couple of silly things to add..


- I love chewing gum; I can finish a whole pack in minutes and don’t even share!
- My favorite food is strawberry cheesecake ice-cream!
- I have a thing for the number 3, it is somehow connected to my life in so many ways!
- Do not even think about mentioning lemonade when ain’t got it to me in the middle of the desert I will make lemonade out of you!
- I hate technology, all forms, from wheels to computers, specifically PCs.
- I will write a book and have it published.
- My dream is to make a change in my lifetime


There it is, that is all how it went down, form the planning to the robbery! Very dramatic indeed!



Anyhow,

I really enjoyed writing this very long piece of writing about myself and for the very first time, this is directed to my dear teacher Dr. Linda Bilton, I am not feeling ashamed and sure of having done a great job.


Until I have more to say, please feel free to comment, object, subject, elaborate or even question.
I will be more than happy to hear some feedback.



Sincerest of regards,
Fatima Bunafoor

A Pearl of Mystic Rythem

I was born and raised here, my parents were, my uncles, my aunts, my grandparents and my every bit and piece of heart belongs to this place. Bahrain, I stand forever proud to be forgotten by everyone within your seas.

We’ve been walking by the seashores for too long, tired yet mesmerized, we’re lost in the midst of this atmosphere. Bedazzled with the kindness and humbled by the unlimited warmth, we have strayed away from our destinations within this place. Small in space, yes this is the fact, but ever small in grace it will be.

Indescribable is the state I’m in at this moment, I always wished to be lost, yes lost, I’m one amongst too many that wish to be lost out here. Here I am striding the streets of simplicity, exhausted by my great state of joy for I’m walking the walk I always dreamt of. The grass is moist with fresh cool dews allover, the breezes are softly running through my hair, the sky is clear, the stars are colored, tonight the stars are lights of each great building surrounding me painting this almost perfect and still painting of peace.

Right opposite of me is the stadium that always reminded me of who I really am, of my past, the past of all the simple people I encounter each morning. It stands there in glory, bright white and flawless, it tells to each visitor the story of my country, the story of the one pearl at the top of it.

Bahrain has a past that is never forgotten, modernized to this new arena of great architect and still untouchable is its generousness. Bahrain has a story of all the different places, Bahrain is the country where various living cultures today choose to be.

Smile you're happy!

Excitement is what you see on most people's faces when they are about to journey a new experience and start over again, something I never was able to welcome with genuine warmth or sincere gratitude at all. These not so good new beginnings in my life have been hell of ones to turn my head around such chances and completely shut them down forgetting that I am actually a human with great chance of missing on life time after time. And new beginnings are what I always will need to be able to forgive and get on with my life for the better. No wonder I am stuck in this vortex of complete confusion all the time!

About ten days ago, a great friend of mine had his new beginning journey. Regardless of his conviction of what to call it, I personally see it this way. An extremely different environment than what I have in my country is where the new start ignites to light the rest of his life. I pray that it does not go against him or his family - Insha'a Allah!


I am socially disabled,  I am! I do not get along with people easily and no, I do not communicate well but I speak a lot to cover up my nervousness and the uncomfortable state I'm always in. Unless I am with books or asleep, I am 97% of the time worried about the what-if's which. as we all know, are poisonous once they take over your mind and soul. El-HamdleAllah, I was a special exception each time I broke down to show my great fear of, well basically, everything in life! Pretty normal you'd say, not when you are me.


Most of the people who know me would understand that I am part of so many programs, projects, I want to make a change in the world, I am known by many -that is what I hate to hear and never say about myself-, I am naive at times, nice or even too nice, judgmental and many other characteristics that do not go together. Being all that I am and am not, I fail to find comfort in those I meet each day and those I chose once failed me greatly -yeah more discomfort agitated me after that. Thanks to God, I managed to find a few people who have managed to break my defense system down into small pieces since they were put together the wrong way due to the disfiguring choices I've made, and solved my puzzle to get this different person I really am and somewhat enjoy the bits of fun in me.


I smile, quite a lot actually, well yeah ALL of the time I do! I love to smile; I always try to do so because it makes me hide away much easily. It misleads you from finding out who I really am. But I do not smile inside at all. I find it hard to make myself smile, thus, I try to smile with the few who recognized my true spirit. However\, they are gone, all gone, some are far, some are busy, some are in my reach but I dare not reach out for, and some are too far to see what that has done to me.

I am trying to be a strong believer of Allah, something I failed to be for a while recently. Therefore, I started to find some peace and comfort in the distance of all my dear ones, but I went back to my old unsuccessful ways, which has been killing my spirit slowly over the years. I did not realize what I have been doing to myself all my life clearer than today in my composition class. We were asked to write notes answering questions written on the whiteboard for three categories: Sad, Happy & Angry. "Oh, that would be short and easy!" I thought to myself with a huge smile drawn on my face not knowing this would be the hardest thing I ever did in university. I was able to fill the Sad and Angry categories gradually but then there was this wanted list in the middle with not even a single, simple answer for any of the seven questions put up on the board by the doctor. I was stuck, we had almost twenty minutes to fill all of them, but I did the other two in about 5 or 8 minutes when I was not able to remember anything for the Happy category! I was shocked! I had so many good moments with my family, my loved ones and my dearest friends. Yet, not a single memory that once lightened up my heart or given me comfort for a second came across my weary mind.

I remember giggling like crazy with many of my friends, doing the craziest things I always thought of doing, blushing or even smiling from joy for my dearests. Yet, I failed to remember a single moment of sincere happiness.

I took a deep breath, turned to look over my left shoulder to catch a look from my far-seated friends and whispered through the spaces between us "I don't have any happy moments." They giggled for my craziness as always and didn't really know that I was terrified more than I ever been from a composition task!

I took a couple more deep breaths, closed my eyes and thought of all those who meant the most to me in life, but not a single thing made me pick a single happy moment. So, I just picked my travel experience polished it with great excitement and happy memories and there it was. I was done from writing one of the happiest moments in my life.

I remember the warmest moments with the guys I love, my best friends and my dearest of people but I cannot identify them clearly for I am no more in such grace. I envy those who have families when I got the greatest, those who construct their ideas clearly and loudly when I do at times, and even the beautiful creatures of God for being worshipers all their lives, something none of us can top!

About happiness they said:

Albert Camus:

You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life.

Aristotle:

Happiness belongs to the self-sufficient



Bertrand Russell:

The happiness that is genuinely satisfying is accompanied by the fullest exercise of our faculties and the fullest realization of the world in which we live.


Brother David Steindl-Rast:
Gratefulness is the key to a happy life that we hold in our hands, because if we are not grateful, then no matter how much we have we will not be happy -- because we will always want to have something else or something more.


Buddha:
Happiness comes when your work and words are of benefit to yourself and others.


I say:

=)

>>> The Blue Seeker Rose <<<

The story goes on..
The song of the silver night is sung..

It started with a white one..
It ended with the red..


I thought it was a wise gun..
Until it came I no longer did!!!

Sparkly blue..
It sparkled in the eyes of a few..
Faster than the fast..
Amid us it flew..


As amazed we were there..
Looking at and not gazing away..
The angel that has come amid us..
Gave us peace and took away the fuss..


No red was seen..
No white was seen either..
No war has been..
It just grew further and further..


The red rose faded away..
A background to the scene it stayed..
Listening to what is being said..
Alive as if dead..

As blue as the sky of the day..
As fare as a feather..
It spoke to thy about the wisdom of the way..
It simply made us feel better..


Life is love and love is life..
We are all the same..
It's the saying of thee above..


Feel the peace..
Let go of hatred..
Don't always seize..
Just enjoy the fragrance..


And as they lied there..
Beneath the silver Blue..
They felt the true meaning of fate..
That Blue is here to set it al free..


Life goes on and we grow they said..
It's not worth it this fight is not..
Hand-in-hand we shall voice it..

A message of peace on this land!

>>> One Red Rose <<<

One white flower
Right from heaven
Right from the stars..

There lays the horizon
Between the words and the dots

I can't forget the feeling
Can't deny what had been said
Words and words are cheering
Peaceful birds ahead

Just the other night
Such an amazing flight
Roses of silver white
Cannot stop what's right

Enjoying every moment
Enjoy every bite
Act like you own it
Be welling to fight

Down they came
Boring like rain
Unleashing what’s inside
Recovering our pain
Killing our laughters
Rejecting all we've gained

After the dawn of peace
The dawn of ease Red roses of hatred
Red roses of pain


One red rose
That's all what it took
One poisoned red rose
It shines and glows
It turns and flows
It kills as it grows
It kills as it grows


It started with a white one
It ended with the red

I thought I was a wise gun
Until it came I no longer did !!

My Story

This is it a dot, a full stop..
This is me and this is my story..
This is where I call you with no hope..
Of ever defeating my glory..
This is it, this is all I got..
Let's leave it up to the jury..


One stupid stupidity..
One big love story..
I gave up all of my immunity..
And madly fell in your love territory..


A risk I was so welling to take..
I never thought I need to fake..
And never had to do that mistake..
For your morality was my break..


Another world was set for you and me..
Another place for us to be..
One more space one more tree..
Imagination was alive and free..
It showed us what we wanted to see..


Reality bites..
Whenever you or I have lost this fight..
How can we switch on our life..
Where is the key to this light..


Now I must move on..
Let go and be strong..
But my soul is here lying alone..
Hopelessly listening to this song..
It cannot be undone..
Our love can’t be forever gone..


Dear Allah! Dearly beloved God of mine!
It is now too late after nine..
My soul bleeds for thine..
To be there when I try some wine..
Or I lose my rime..
Oh, Thee! Oh Devine!
I love him with all my spine..
I ask you to let this feeling shine..
High above and guide me to the line..
In which I shall fall till the end of time..

The Declaration of Independence

****
I learned this today
The day I saw them leave
I learned this the hard way
God ! I wish I could retrieve

***

I don't live to play
Nor I wish to recieve
I now seek to sway
Yet I am failing to achieve

***

God, when I am sad, taught me to pray
And though I can't change my believe
I search the day
When true me is back indeed

***

A tale never has a end
Although till the end we seek
We fail and fail depends
On broken hopes and Dear
To gain the truth you need the lend
Of a helping hand to cheer

***

Oh Day Oh Night Oh Life!!!
How can I smile as bright
Be strong and teach me how to no longer thrive
For day comes after night
I wish not to be a bride
I learned it once and shall not fight
I breathe and am alive
Need some guidance to the light

***

For here dear this I bare
Just standing in the dim
The pain, the love and care
Though I have done no sin
One day i shall declare
The secrets deep within
alone i must not be in despair
I'll try my best to win

***

The whole world put aside
Let's end this foolish game
I didn't know how to glide
And now I gained its fame
Each coin has more backs to a side
And my growth of this shall cause no shame

****

قصاصاتي الفضية ترقص!

سلالمٌ تُغْزلُ مِن صوفِ الحرية،،

تتسلسلُ بسلاسةِ الروح للجسد،،

راسمةً... ابتسامة، شعور، فهفوة!

غفوت على محرمٍ من دموع

لأصحو على صوت غريب

هل أنا أحلم أم ما أراه هو المستحيل!

بقايا وهم بدت تمتثل أمامي على قصاصاتٍ من ورق

تتراقص مع نسيم الليل لتحكي ما قد مضى

قصص من وهم بل بقايا ألمٍ لَمْ يكد..

سرحت بخيالي بين صفحاتِ الورق

لأرسو على شاطئ ملؤه الحرية..

هل أنا أهذي ..؟

هل هذا سراب ؟؟!

هل هذه يا سيدي يدك تكفكف دموعٍ من وهم!

رباه!

أعِنّي على العودة إلى صفحات الحقيقة

أعدني إلى جوهر هذه الأغنية

فهي بعد رحيلك مجرد بقايا أمنية

بقيت مطوية حتى رأيته

بين وسادة و دموع و بقايا ورق تتراقص تحت ظلال القمر..

فلترقصي ما شئتي و لتسلبي خيالي في غمار عالمٍ من الحرية

قصاصاتي الفضية،،

غدا أصحو لعالم الحقيقة من سحرك الخلاب و أغدو أنا.

كفانا جدالا..*

اقتليني!


بين همسة و جدال


خطي من دمي عبراً و ما شئتي لمن بعدي من رجال


اقتليني و اندمي ثم اقتليني حتى يغادرك هذا الخيال!


وداعا أيها الطيف البريء ... لقائنا بات محال


بين طيات القميص الملطخ و ابتهالات النضال


اقتليني و ليكن لهم مني عبراً و لينتهي هذا الموال


أربعون عاماً بتُ طفلاً مقيدَ المصير في انتظار


علني اليوم أغادر علّي اليوم اغتال!


أقتليني اقتليني فدموعكي بعد فراقي باتت محال


من أنا لأبقى معلقاً بطعن سكين إمرأة بهذا الجمال


اقتليني ودعيتي اليوم أرحلُ باستبسال


طيفك لم يغادرني بعد فراقنا... بل هو لا يزال


بادري بطعني عند العاشرة وقتما كنا نتجادل كل ليلة


ليتي أفيق بعدها مسلوب الخيال


لأنهي حرب نفسي مع نفسي في ظلم هذه الظلال


اقتليني سيدتي عندها فقط فقد مللت الارتجال!

(2) أناقش القلم

عدت لمكان اللقاء الأول و قلبي يتلهف إلى أن يُسعدَ قلبها علها تسترجع ابتسامتها و نتسامر متناسين رياح الليل القارص و أشعة النجوم المشتعلة غيرةً منها.

كاسراً لقوانين الطبيعة و عهوده التي قطعها على نفسه و أمام مشهدٍ من صغار النجوم المتلألأ انحنى مقترباً من نافذتها المفتوحة. أظلّم الليل على أصغر المخلوقات و تسائل الجميع مالذي يحدث؟ أين يا ترى اختفى القمر في ليلة صافيةٍ كهذه؟


"أيعقل هذا؟ خصلاتها المبعثرة مازالت تغطي مابقي من وجهها الشاحب المختبئ بين ثنيات الشراشف المتجمدة حول ملامح وجهها."

أطال تأمله بمنظرها المحزن في صمتٍ ثم واصل يتمتم " كيف لي أن ألون هذه الصورة لتصبح قربية من الحقيقة. أيعقل أن يلبث جسدٌ كما فارقتُهُ الأمس، ساكناً ، هائماً بين شراشف من ثلوج قد نسيه الشتاء!"

كليلة من الخيال طغاها السواد، فقدت ملامح الجمال المخملي الذي لطالما عبرت عنه بزينة من اللؤلؤ المتألق تحت انعكاساتٍ من ضوء القمر البهي الذي اختفى في هذه الليلة. جلس في سكون غريب مفترشاً نافذتها راثياً حالها إلى أن نهضت ناشرةً عبيرا من الحياة في أرجاء المكان معلنةً خروجها من سباتٍ عميق.


"هل أطلت الانتظار عند نافذتي؟ لِمَ لمْ توقظني؟!"

أجابها القمر فرحاً "لم أشأ أن أزعجكِ!" ثم أكمل متردداٌ " كما... كما أنني لم أعلم بمَ أناديكِ و أنا أجهل ما هو أسمكِ!"


"وكيف لك أن تزعجني و أنت تعلم أنني استمتع بمجرد أن أراقبك في أصفى الليالي و اليوم أنت في مقربٍ مني و أصبحت ضيفا عندي!"


عاد للقمر زهوه و انتشر نوره مرة أخرى ليرسم حدوداً لكواكب السماء النائمة و ينير عوالمها. غمرَ قلبه الفرح لرؤيتها تتألق إثرَ لقائهما. ولكنه مازال يجهل اسمها رغم تنبيهه لها!


"ألا تمتلكين اسماً ؟"


بدأ ضوء القمر المشع يخفت مع مرور الزمن ليظلّم الليل معلناً حزنه.

نظرت إليه مبتسمة، ليس بشفاهها بل بقلبها و لكن هنالك شيءٌ يسيطر على شفاهها ولكأنما اختارت تلك الصغيرة أن تخفيَ ابتسامتها في مأمنٍ من الناظر. جلسا دون حراك طوال تلك الليلة، هي تبتسم مراقبةً زائرها الحائر وهو يغوص في عالمٍ من نسج مشاعرها الخفية.


"ألن تخبرينني ماهو اسمكِ؟" سأل مستيقظاً من حلم اليقظة "لا." هذا كان ردها ببساطة غير مكثرثةٍ بحيرته بل غارقةٍ في عالم من نسجها. " يجب أن أعود إلى النوم." غادرته تاركةً إياه في ضياعٍ تام بين خصـلاتٍ و ظلامٍ و سكون.

(1) أناقش القلم

عدنا و العود أحمد،،

لقد اشتقت إلى القلم فقررت أن استعيد ميراثه من خلال محاولة صغيرة في سلسلة قصصية من وحي الواقع و نسج الخيال،،

أتمنى أن تعجبكم و أترقب تعليقاتكم

اليوم الأول:

في محاولةٍ أخرى لها لاستثارة الحرية و الخروج عن "قانون الطبيعة" رسمت لها درباً يختلف عن سيرة ذويها لتنفى إلى محفل من العزلة.

ثوبٌ مخضبٌ بعبير الحياة، رموشُ تتهادى مع حركاتِ النسيم، زهرةٌ قد لونت وجنتيها برونقٍ جميل، و عينان تضيع في سكونها أحلام الفتية. سكنت على طرف نافذتها تراقبُ القمر بل طال سكونها فارتابت النجوم من أمرها. من يا ترى هذه؟ من هي تلك الصغيرة من بني البشر ؟

"ما الذي أتى بكِ مرة أخرى لدفئ أحضاني صغيرتي؟ ماذا حدث؟" سألها القمر. "أباكية في صمت لحنين و أمل أم مجروحة الفؤاد جئتني؟".

مهمش الوجود في ظلال البرائة كان ذلك الصوت الحزين يتهجأ في لحظات ليهمس متردداً "أحـــ.... أحتاج إلى أن ابتسم!" ما إن نطقت بها تلك الصغيرة حتى اغرورقت عيناها بالدموع. " يا ليتني لم أهمس ببنت شفه عما كان يدور في ذهني، قد كان لجرأتي ثمنٌ يعجز الحرف عن تضميد جراحه".

في حيرة من أمره قد سكن كسكون ضوئه على جفون عينيها، ليخط حدود دموعها و كأنما يضع حداً لآلامها. في قلق و يأس تمتم "أنظري إلي وسط سكون ليلة الغد علني أستطيع أن أجعل ابتسامتك تعود".

و افترقا، هي لتذبل على فراشٍ من ثلوج يخمدُ أحاسيسها المتقدة، وهو ليسهر على منظرٍ يحزن قلب المتأمل. خصلاتٌ مبعثرة فوق بياضِ تلك الثلوج قد غطت وجهها و دموعها و جميع ملامح الحياة بين إطارٍ من فضة مغطى بنافذة التصقت بها ملامح تلك الصغيرة.

و هنا تنتهي الليلة وسط حزنٍ و ضياعٍ و حيرة ليشرق يومٌ آخر و صفحةٌ جديدة.

Vortex of change

A strange compelling feeling has always urged us to seek those things we never owned, never had and always "thought" we deserved. What strikes us most when we obtain such things is the fact that we did not really own such “idealistic materials” at all. Yes, you read it correctly, it is never ours, not entitled with our initials or anything, not yours!

It is mind-gobbling how far we go to succeed in fulfilling our materialistic brains by possessing. Things we do not really deserve, let’s be honest since they are not ours in the first place, tend to always remind us of that little object in the window of a glamorous uptown shop screaming “have me, I am all alone and sad!”

Long story short, it is called advertisement. Believe it or not, all our lives we are deceived into believing what we lack is actually what we “want” leading us to disregard what we actually “need” in order to prosper and develop our societies. Some may argue this is the master plan of those who aim to control our freedoms into their gain and develop us as robots systemized for their benefit. Somehow true, yet others also may argue, who is to decide what is and what is not in real life, with disregard of spirituality that not all believe in, like it or not, we all tend to agree no one should!

Shocking as it may seem, this deception which we are targeted by since birth starts from the womb; mothers singing sweet lullabies to their growing children until it is a routine of childhood life, fathers unconsciously subjecting wives and families to a mechanism of servitude, a very efficient machine for control, and many others which vary in form and source. Nevertheless, the most affective and hypnotic tool of radical conviction-reformative tools is the evolutionary media network, very accessible and easy to use.

The issue being presented here is not a new one, nor it is an old, it is an ancient renewable touch point to tackle per generation. A problematic universe is being created based upon this medium of examination, I personally believe, to one’s endurance ability. Justified to religion, to the reason of and to other exploratory analysis by different kinds of theologies and believes.

Whether we believe that we are brain-washed or not, we are! All we need to do is wake up to embrace this new notion of true life which we ever have been ignorant of its truth. A friend constantly reminds me of his saying “You can’t embrace the past, you shouldn’t!” I never saw the good of that till at one point I did, a lesson well-learned thanks to my dear friend. As humans, we tend to deny the truth and get sucked into this vortex of deceptive almost realities which invade our minds and lives. We grow numb and disabled to live life normally. However, when we gain the strength to actually defy the norms and consider all the possibilities, this is only when we really are able to clearly state “we are not brain-washed!” Such an experience is a rare one, does not come easily or occasionally. One must struggle through the hardest battles of all times taking on himself the pledge of conquering the battle of mind and soul which, lost or won, can only lead to liberation of both!

We are not to forget where we came from, nor what we are or what we aspire to be in the future. We must not erase our pasts, reconstruct our presents or rephrase our ambitions for the future. And we are not to reform! Simply, what we are to do is to reflect on all of those by remembering the good moments, learning from our falls, re-establishing ourselves into our presents and ultimately, progress the embitterment of our futures.