June 6, 2010

The Forbidden Prayer

I established a base on which I stand and through life I commit myself to different journeys and adventures, some of which I am able to direct and others I am the trivial obedient. I miss my souls for it has abandoned me last year with no introduction. I am unable to speak.  Silence, ever since, has been my best companion.

I fell in love not too long ago, I fell in love and I keep on over and over again. From the moment I set my eyes on him I knew I have encountered something beyond human understanding. I love him and I owe everything I own as well as  my life to his support.

I was never raised in a religious family; sure, my family is all religious and what not but that was not the main rule in my family, belief was a matter of personal choice and once you choose it there is no turning back. Scary huh? Not really, it is rather realistically independent and it teaches the individual a lot. Nonetheless, on that road self-discovery has become one proponent of my entire journey, morality was my new identity.

I am attributed with the character of "nice", as good as it sounds, most of those I know negate it infinitely because it derives my power to be self-dependent and a strong character in my society  something I have always striven for throughout my personal career. I am nice, good or bad, I am. I presume it badly, however, I live with it. I love being nice, it is one of my main morale values; be nice, you are treated likewise, even when you are betrayed, back stabbed, used and misled, remain the same, nice, and those who have assaulted you will be nice at the end of the day. One very important aspect of morale treatment of others. Do good and you are rewarded, no matter how long it takes, regardless of the troublesome times in between, yous souls loves being nice.

I wanted to pray the other day, this prayer I have missed for a very long time. It simply explains the great sorrow and repent I wish to establish in order to be forgiven for the sins of my past, the mistakes of my present and the secular aspirations of my future. I am not at all religious in the terms allotted today by our religious leaders and institutions, I am not at all conservative as well, I am simply morale and I seek to make my religious practices accordingly to what my mind, soul and faith guides me to to be.

I believe this is the only solutions to every problem in our lives. I do no assume a life free of any  problems, this is a normal and an integral part of the life that we promote our personalities into better ones through hardships, nevertheless, I assume a life of great fortune of the souls.

I love him, loved him and never imagine myself falling in love with anyone but him. Despite the debates of the non-religious, the attempts of the atheists and the skeptical to either negate this unjustifiable belief system or defy it for a better understanding, to both debaters, I remain in love with my God till the end of times. I cannot explain it, I do not believe it is justifiable to the human brain not is it exemplification by evidential references or scientific rules or even equations; my love lies with the fold of air in my articulation units, the grain-size elements of my blood, the smallest particle that formulates the simplest of natural elements; my love for Him is a matter of a forbidden prayer.

You cannot kneel down one day, in great sorrow, regret, remorse and lose, then  raise a pure and honest contemplation of the human soul that's destiny is indistinguishable and eventually rise up with the same initial emotions.

God exists, the reasons are not understandable and my brain as well as most of the religious cannot articulate the identifiable reasons. Although, God resides somewhere out there and all the mythical ideals do relate to him in all their forms.

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